OneAndOneIs2

Whether in forums (fora?) or in nasty emails, trolls are everywhere on the Internet. The best policy is to ignore them: To put it crudely, feeding a troll just lets him produce more crap to throw back at you. But it's not always desirable or practical to ignore a troll.

So, IMHO, the best way to respond is:

Never respond in anger
Simple rule: If a troll upsets you, he's won. If you let him know he's upset you, he'll know he's won.

So do your best not to let him get to you. If you fail, do your utmost not to let it show.

Let's face it, a troll is not looking for debate or intelligent feedback. Anybody who posts "Windows is best" in a Linux forum, or "Witchcraft rules" in a Christian forum, or "Darwin was right" in an Intelligent Design forum, is there only to provoke people.

The only emotion it's safe to show a troll is jubilation: If his every jibe and taunt elicts nothing but amusement, then he's lost: He's brightened up your day when he wanted to darken it. There's no worse failure for a troll than being seen as a joke.

Be unfailingly courteous
Partly this is an extension of the first rule: It's almost impossible to be rude to a troll without him taking it as a sign that you're angry.

But more than that, rudeness gives him more ammunition: He can now play the role of martyr, savagely attacked by the screaming fanatics he dared to inoffensively criticise. There doesn't have to be any logic to it: He's not there for intelligent debate, he's there to inflame. Being rude feeds a troll.

And that does include calling a troll a troll. He can and will use this as an insult.

Don't argue
Never fight a war you can't win. Trolls aren't interested in facts. There is no way to refute the argument "It sucks!" So don't try.

Disagree with his viewpoint, but don't argue about it. Counter "It sucks!" only with "No it doesn't." or "I don't agree that it does." - never with "No it doesn't, because. . . "

Never give the troll any significance
Even if you obey all the above rules, you can still make a troll happy if you seem to consider he's important: If you respond to every one-line troll with a 50-line rebuttal, then the troll is clearly getting to you, no matter how you word the replies.

Short & sweet is the way to go. If you obey the "Don't argue" rule, it should be fairly easy.

As in:

Troll: It sucks!

Reply: Sorry to hear you don't like it. But I like it, and so do most others on this forum.

Troll: It sucks, and if you like it, you must suck too!

Reply: If it gives you any happiness to think that, go ahead and do so. Your opinion doesn't affect me either way.

Troll: Oh, good argument. If that's the best you can come up with, no wonder it sucks so much!

Reply: I'm not trying to argue with you.

Troll: Then why are you replying at all?

Reply: I'm bored and you're mildly amusing.

You get the idea, I'm sure! :o)