OneAndOneIs2

I have an alarm clock.

It has one cool feature - it projects the time onto the ceiling in big enough numbers that I can read them in the dark without my glasses. It also never gets the time wrong because it uses some radio signal or other. DST never catches IT out.

I've had it for.. Hmm... three years? Four? Something like that. And I've woken up to it almost every working day of each of those years. Hundreds and hundreds of times.

But do you know what the alarm sounds like when it goes off?

No. Neither do I. I'm too darn tired when I wake up to actually commit the sound to memory. And that's even with my habit of hitting "snooze" a few times most days, which doubles or triples the number of times I've heard the damn thing.

However.. it's a bit of a pain to alter the time the clock is set to go off at. So I usually just turn it off and set my phone to wake me instead.

What idiot at Nokia thought it'd be a good idea to replace the old-fashioned beeping with a woman's voice saying "It's time to wake up!"

I was up till 1am last night, what with marking books and planning for today's assessed lesson (which I passed, by the way, even if I didn't think it was a very good lesson) so I gave myself an extra half-hour in bed.

Under five hours of sleep later, I blearily wake up to hear some annoying woman telling me to get out of bed. I halfway expected the bossy cow to tell me to hurry up in the bathroom because she needed to do her hair.

On the plus side, I suppose, at least you can take comfort in knowing that it only take a quick prod and she shuts up for ten minutes.

But really...